an allegory of affection from a Hindu goddess

I experienced the following dream: Walking through wilderness, I came upon a female tiger. She considered me, and I considered her—I calculated my next move through my fear, she simply calculated. Rapidly concluded that if I ran she’d chase me down and eat me. So I held my head up and approached her gently. Reached […]

here is my other cheek

An open letter, because direct contact is shut off: ———, Here is my other cheek:  Threaten me again if you must. You have my complete forgiveness and infinite compassion. You and your family will always remain in my prayers. There are few bridges you can burn that I am unwilling to mend. You are better […]

on adoptee violence

The following is a letter to a friend, who asked me about using DNA sequencing to find an explanation for her adopted, adolescent son’s violent behavior: K——-, I’ve thought much about violence from adoptees, as a woman I deeply love experiences the same behavior from her daughter(s). Interestingly, she adopted her daughters from a Russian […]

a non-linear and holistic work ethic

I started working out a holistic map of my work ethic and work values, and quickly found that linearity failed to cut it. Essentially, I need to capture the interdependencies between spiritual, social, and financial wealth. More importantly, I need to illustrate the crucial balance between these factors. Enter non-linear system dynamics: Simulation, based on […]

why we still need cyberpunk

William Gibson penned Neuromancer over thirty years ago, and the 1990’s ended viciously on 9/11. With the exception of cyberfeminism, I wrote off “cyberpunk” as an ethic once we as a society stopped saying “cyber” and replaced the word with “online”. Yesterday I traced partial assets of an individual I distrusted—and needed the straight dope […]

teaching joy (part one)

A conversation with a friend today illuminated my burning desire to teach existential joy to anyone who will listen. Unfortunately, we agreed that this cannot be distilled into a recipe—that everyone must custom-make their own solution to joy’s perceived scarcity. But we also agreed that I can succeed at the teaching process through the following […]

how to validate someone who won’t talk with you

We occasionally find ourselves in the situation where someone we love deeply refuses to communicate with us. In this video I present six strategies for transmitting validation across the divide. (A text version of this content is available here). I sincerely hope you find this material useful in your own life! Please let me know how […]

how to validate someone who won’t talk with you (text version)

(A video version of this content is available here). In my post “on love“, I describe active validation of one’s beloved as a key tactic for transmitting constructive love. I further discuss how that validation must express in terms of things eternal, rather than in terms of the one sending the validation. In other words, […]

make an intent board

Optimism is a skill. A simple exercise that strengthens your focus and direction involves creating an “intent board”, also called a “dream board” or a “vision board”. These serve me well in life! Basically, you make a poster, or in my case a Pinterest board, called “Intent” and fill it with images that speak to […]