how to validate someone who won’t talk with you

We occasionally find ourselves in the situation where someone we love deeply refuses to communicate with us. In this video I present six strategies for transmitting validation across the divide. (A text version of this content is available here). I sincerely hope you find this material useful in your own life! Please let me know how […]

how to validate someone who won’t talk with you (text version)

(A video version of this content is available here). In my post “on love“, I describe active validation of one’s beloved as a key tactic for transmitting constructive love. I further discuss how that validation must express in terms of things eternal, rather than in terms of the one sending the validation. In other words, […]

at a wedding in Delhi

One of the most amazing experiences of my journey into womanhood occurred when I attended a wedding in Delhi. The bride knew me before I transitioned, but immediately embraced my identity as Emily when I announced it. We quickly became extremely good friends, and I therefore eagerly attended her wedding when the time came. I […]

on love

Thought it time to write an essay (of sorts) on the nature of love: Here I specifically mean Romantic love, partnership love; not other kinds. I won’t throw Greek words at you to differentiate between the types of love as many writers do (e.g. C.S. Lewis), except I thought I’d decide to use the term […]

“distorted and out of tune” – a troll (sort of) gets it

I received the following response from a troll regarding music [4] I released recently: The music is “distorted” and dissonant—and would sound “out of tune” to many who lack musical sophistication. That is intentional. A compositional choice. And the dissonance intentionally speaks to the experience of feeling “out of tune” as a transgender person. So […]

enjoying a man’s patronization

Today at the bar a man I’d never seen before glanced at my highly scarred arm and said: “Oh sweetie, looks like you got an owie.” He appeared roughly ten years older than me and quite attractive. Nice voice. Nice pheromones. I liked him immediately. Yes the words patronized me—treated me like a child. (He […]